Almost twenty years ago Astrophysicists discovered something
called “Vagabond Planets”. These are
planets that have been flung out into space that don’t really orbit a star or
other large body in the galaxy. They are just sitting there in space all alone,
no other mass around it. No one living on it. No real orbit to speak of. It’s
just floating all alone in space. This is a pretty cool phenomenon to me. Just
being alone. Nothing to bother you. No one pulling you one way or another. You
just sit there, existing.
When I
heard about these galactic hermits I immediately liked them. Given, I knew
nothing about them and the scientists that discovered them don’t know much
about them either. They just know they exist. Which is cool. They are like a
giant mystery that we can’t really solve. Sure, we can beam all sorts of rays
at them and see what they may be made of but they can never really know what
they are or how they got there. Sure, they can speculate but to know exactly
what caused them to be flung out of their past orbit into the great void to
live its life alone and floating through time on its own course is a bit of an
enigma.
Maybe I
like them because they are alone, they have nothing but themselves for company
and they are dependent upon nothing for their existence. They are just there.
Which is cool to me.
You see, I
am by nature, a person who likes to be alone. I like solitude and being alone
with the maniac that lives inside of my mind. I enjoy sorting through my
thoughts and figuring out who I am. Why I said what I said in certain
situation. Why I acted the way I did in front of people. Not all of these
thoughts are pleasant, not all of my answers are positive. No, instead, I spend
a good portion of my time beating myself up for past mistakes and trying to
figure out how to not make those mistakes in the future.
Of course,
I’m not alone I have a wife, I have a daughter, a family so to speak. I have
brothers, sisters, parents, cousins, aunts and uncles. My life is filled with
people who tug and pull on my life in many different ways. Just as you do. Just
as our planets tug and pull on each other. But you know, the most demands in my
life come from my daughter.
Children
will tug and pull on your life like no other force in creation. In my case, it
has been an honor and pleasure. Tomorrow my child turns seventeen. Since her
inception she has been a constant source of joy and wonderment in my life.
Through all of her ups and downs. Her daily and weekly passions that fade as
quickly as they arise, through her crushes, loves and heartbreaks and through
her continuous daily life, she has struggled, succeeded and grown in ways that
amaze me.
She is far
more mature and ready for life than I was at her age. Probably more mature than
I am at this age. She has a focus that would put a trained sniper to shame and
a vision for her future that most people never have and never will.
Her
attitude when faced with obstacles and adversarial conflict is one of
determination and pragmatism. Through all of her experiences she keeps a good
attitude, wit and sarcasm that speak to her upbringing and how she sees the
world.
Her
self-reliance and dignity are two traits that I know will help her make the
right decisions in pretty much every situation she will be faced with. Not to
mention, at her age, that of a teenager who should be rebelling against her
parents, her teachers and the status quo of the world is pretty much
non-existent. I’ve no idea how she became so well rounded, so accepting of
others or even how she became so passionate about equality and justice for
everyone.
I believe
that she is the one force in my life that has had more impact on my life than
any other force. From the second I found out I was going to be a father, to
those fleeting moments when I held her on the day she came into the world to
those wonderful hugs I get from her every day, I have been pulled into the
solar system of her life simply by being her father. I am honored to be her dad
and even more honored to be recognized as her father by others.
My dream of
being a vagabond planet, a hermit so to speak will never come to fruition,
simply because the strongest force in my life is my own child. I love you Goose
and I hope you have an awesome birthday.
Have a
great week.
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