Thanks for the Love.
After this past week it is amazing to me that I am still existing. If you my dear reader took the time to read last week’s blog and the insanity I went through to keep my home and you were thinking to yourself “Damn, I’m glad I’m not Skip. Can’t get much worse for him.” To which I’d answer “Oh, but wait… there’s more.”
Yes dear reader, there is more. And I hate to be a downer and if you want to stop reading, that’s cool. I won’t hold it against you. After all, who wants to read about a craptastic week? Not me.
However; I do have some things to say about what has been going on and I feel you all deserve for me to be as forthright as I can be. So, without further ado… let’s tear into the guts of my life and see what sort of mess is inside of me.
You see, a while back my wife’s jeep developed a slow leak in one of its tires. When it first started the tire only required me to put air in it once a week. I tried to keep track of the leak, I tried to find extra funds to purchase a new tire, but all my efforts were in vain. Then, finally, the tire was requiring air twice a day. On top of this, the jeep developed an oil leak, the kind of leak where you fill the oil and check the gas level. So, she started to drive my car.
On Friday of last week, after I spent endless hours on the phone with the mortgage company, the car died. I spent a good amount of time replacing the starter in the car. Three separate starters. The car finally started and then promptly died again. I’m still trying to figure out what is wrong with it. I’m thinking it may be the battery.
As for the jeep, my pal Brian, who also happens to be my pastor, offered to get tires for the jeep. I tried to refuse. That refusal was not accepted. So I ended up with two new tires. When it came to replacing the tires… well, let me just say, two of the lug bolts, not lug nuts, but lug bolts had broken off the axel. Good news there is that they were both on the same axel. Which means I only have to remove one axel to get the two new lug bolts re-inserted.
Through all of these car repairs in the one hundred degree weather I’ve had help. People who’ve been by my side physically or emotionally. First off, Barry, my pal and probably the best friend I’ve ever had. Then there was my Mom who spent hours on the phone with me listening to my plight, my anger and my frustration. My wife, who spent hours in person listening to my plight, my anger and my frustration. George, who offered advice and orders on car repair. Lastly, Brian, who refuses to give up on me in any and all occasions.
It’s funny. Whenever I believe I’m alone, that there is no help, that my life is one deep chasm that I’m plunging down at an alarming rate, someone, some people show up and offer a hand or advice that will calm me and slow my descent into madness down. It is times like this when I wonder what they see in me. Wonder why they would help. Wonder if I’m even worth their time, energy and money.
Inevitably, when I voice those thoughts, I’m told to shut up and just accept the help. That they care about me. That somehow my life is important to them and others that I don’t even realize.
“You are family.” Brian told me.
“You are family.” My wife told me.
“You are family.” My mom told me.
“You’re and idiot.” Barry told me. (Which is the same as being family in his book.)
Others said the same thing or something quite similar. (Not about being an idiot mind you, that is strictly Barry.)
In light of all that has transpired, the events of the past week and of my blog on family, this shows to me that yes, while there are those in our lives that are blood related, the ones who become family over time through our lives seems to be as important if not more important than the blood relatives that seem to disappear into the horizon of time. This is of no fault of mine, yours or theirs. This is just how life is.
Our families are the ones that stick with us. Through thick, thin, illness, success and loneliness. They are quick to call you out on your bullshit. They are ready with praise and they help when you don’t want them to or ask them to.
In other words, you never truly know who your family is until they are in your face not letting you be an idiot.
So, for all my family members out there…